Letter to My Friends: Lifelong, New, and Future
As many already know, I keep my circle tight and my inner circle even tighter. Everyone within my circle has the same common denominator traits in terms of persona, integrity, character, dependability, punctuality and the other things which reflect what I am personally all about. Even if many of them have stark differences in every other area of their lives, whether it be race, faith beliefs, mores, family values and what not, the baseline traits are homogeneous across the board. A man’s friends are a reflection of who he is and what he stands for.
That said, I have friends who I have maintained a healthy relationship with for over 20 years, and a handful who I have known since I was in first grade (that is about 31, 32 years, if doing your kids’ common core math has screwed up your deduction). I value friendship. It’s not just about “my niggas” (as it is said from around the way), but also enjoying healthy relationships with women, as well. You know, something that many believe cannot be achieved — unless they are unattractive and physically unappealing, of which none of my closest female friends are, by the way — so it can be done. It can be done, yes, if you see them as a peer and respect them for who they are inside and out, and not solely as an object of affection or sexual projection. I am no eunuch, but these are tenets and byproducts of something my dad said to me repeatedly seemingly every day while I was growing up: “Treat others the way you would like to be treated.” Because I sincerely do this (those who have crossed me; relatives included, know how physically violent I can be, on the converse, when betrayed — but why betray me, anyway, right?), people of all walks have gravitated toward me over the years. I cherish this. It has helped enhance my life; particularly in the areas of becoming widely cultured, appreciating differences in believes, mores and values, and overall teaching me things that I did not already know. It’s part of a well-rounded existence; something that I perpetuate to others who I come into contact with in return.
With these things given, I submit this letter to my friends and, if I have more of an acquaintanceship with you (i.e. “met” on social media) then you qualify as well. But specifically for my circles; both on the periphery and the inner circle, those who have been my friends for 25+ years already know, those who have gravitated towards me in recent months and years have probably ascertained by now, and those who I will make friends with in the future can trust and know these things:
— If I got it, you got it.
— I do what I say I will do at all times; barring extenuating circumstances.
— I do what I say I will do and when (punctuality again) I will do it, at all times; barring extenuating circumstances.
— I am not perfect and do not require perfection. I value words in alignment with action. I do this, and expect the same, without excuses, lest you be barred from my inner circle.
— I have your back at all times (unless you’re breaking the law or violating someone, then you’re on your own), all I ask is reciprocity in that regard.
— Be honest.
— My inner circle does not hesitate to tell me about myself, good or (especially) bad, and you already know I do the same. I hate passive aggression and sugarcoated euphemisms.
If you cannot do these things. Stay away. For both our sakes.