M.D. Wright

I have always wondered why people romanticize the act of someone “losing” their virginity. Movies make it seem as if a girl has to have the perfect scenario where she’s on a bed of roses in a five star hotel, following a $1,500 meal at Cipriani’s (and so many young women think the same thing in real life). It is not a pretty process. For anyone who is not a virgin, and those men among us who have “taken” (I hate these terms) a woman‘s virginity, knows that it is not all peaches and cream, and pie in the sky as some seem to believe that it should be. There’s no reason to be graphic in details. If you’re a woman, most likely your first time was not pretty at all. For those men among us who have been a woman’s first, you will agree that it is as painstaking of an experience akin to watching a newborn calf attempt to gain its balance for its first steps. I just wanted to get that thought out there, because it has bothered me for years.


The real issue that prompted me to write this piece.

I have a problem with women who gallivant around calling other women “hoes” and “sluts” and saying thing such as, “He only wit her because she easy!”

I really do.

That statement is often one made out of jealousy. You hear it from women who lose out on a guy who they had their eyes and hearts set on, without even knowing anything about the other woman. There are situations where he runs off and cheats on one woman and gets with another (something that I do NOT condone whatsoever, but happens), and the vitriol is (aptly) aimed at both the cheater and the woman he cheats with. That much is understandable. However, while cheating is not condoned, how often do you find out later that the woman who was being cheated on was a stone wall in bed? Refusing to do certain things out of selfishness more than anything else? Only to find out that the woman that he slides with is willing? Once again, cheating is not condoned, but one has to wonder how some women are so naive as to think that by withholding sexual relations, or doing certain things sexually — not because of personal preference, but out of pride and selfishness — that there aren’t other women out there who are more than willing?

Besides, where in the annals is there a clause that says, “Only do what you like, with no concern for fulfilling the desires of your partner, while only seeking your own”? Sure, I have listened to women complain about men doing this — and I agree with them, it is selfish on THESE MEN’S parts for doing so. But two wrongs don’t make a right, and while cheating is foul and should not be condoned, the moral of the story is:

IF YOU AIN’T WILLING, BEST BELIEVE ANOTHER WOMAN IS. Don’t ever think you will get away with withholding your all without there being issues in the future.

And that goes for both women AND men. This is not a pile-on session against women. But you don’t get to call other women sluts and hoes when they’re merely willing to do what you aren’t. Step up your bedroom game and leave it all out on the court like a player in Game 7 of the Finals. If he cheats, then he’s a dastardly piece of shit, but it won’t be because you were withholding and being selfish or prideful.

I don’t care who agrees or disagrees, but I know this takes place, because I have experienced it first hand — I just never cheated on any woman I was with, and never plan to. I did the responsible thing and communicated my thoughts and concerns, instead of  doing the juvenile thing by sliding off with some random jump off out of spite.



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