Relationships: Tales of Lies, Cheating, Steve Smith, Sabotage & DeSean Jackson
We’ve all been in a relationship with someone, and you thought everything was going well, haven’t wel? You were each getting to know the other and having fun while doing so, you each had experienced each others’ ups and downs emotionally and knew what you were getting into. Both of you were consenting adults and agreed to communicate effectively, talk things out when you had tiffs and be open and honest.
THEN THAT HAPPENS.
One day, in a weak moment, he (or she) runs into someone either from their past, or someone who approached them on a nondescript, random day and struck up a conversation that hit a chord within. While they initially did nothing to cross the line and violate your relationship, the seeds were planted. One day you go to his/her Facebook page and you suddenly begin to see this person — who you haven’t been introduced to — “liking” and commenting on his/her wall daily, as if it were their job. Even for the non-jealous types, this strikes a red flag.
WHAT KIND OF BACKROOM DEALS YOU GOT GOING ON?
They (the proverbial “they” denotes the court of public opinion) say that new d*ck or new p*ssy will keep a relationship fresh. I am not one for condoning or participating in cheating, so wihle I understand the sentiment — albeit spoken from a liberal mind — I would never sign that. I am so against cheating that I pledge that I will literally shoot first and ask questions later if, with the WHOLE WORLD KNOWING, including the woman who enters into a covenant with me — that I am one of the few faithful men left, that if she cheats on me like a skyrocketing number of women are doing; playing catch-up with men millennia at a time — that she deserves it.
That outside rendezvous stuff can and usually will (just like HIV/AIDS) either really quickly, or slowly, but surely kill a relationship. Even the most liberal-minded people (who are usually the most narrow-minded and most selfish, which is ironic) will eventually pull a jealous move after a while.
Unless you’re Andrei Kirilenko’s wife.
The thing is, relationship sabotage is not gender-specific. Both women AND men do it. The rationale and execution therein may differ, but it still stems from the same root: COWARDICE.
GROW A SET.
Even if your rationale and reasoning may be fallacious, be honest with the other person. I’ve seen (and experienced it first-hand) where someone new comes into the equation, usually when the one previous is in a down period — and they’ve begun texting, sexing and sexting the new person. However, rarely will you hear a guy just be straight up and honest. He’ll talk in platitudes and have a novel’s worth of excuses as to why he just wanted to go smash that chick because he never got the chance to do so before, but suddenly the opportunity is there and he, in a faux-considerate moment of guilty conscience, tells you “I would rather ‘take a break’ right now than hurt your feelings because I don’t know where my heart is leading me right now”.
Nigga yes you do. RIGHT INTO HER BED IN 4G AS SOON AS YOU GET OFF THE PHONE.
Guys will lie like a sleeping dog and talk in circles like John Madden in order to sabotage a relationship, but the thing is, they’re doing it for some NuNu, not because the woman he’s going for is an upgrade over the one he’s with.
While no more or less justified, most of the time women will do the same while sabotaging a relationship. They’ll make up lies about the guy they’re with, then start petty and baseless arguments to have a reason to say “See, we fight too much, so it’s not going to work out”, because she can’t just say she’s screwing the mechanic, or her co-worker, or her sister’s man. She’d rather leave you with the guilt trip and feeling like a villain when you’re nothing more than the innocent bystander who got left at the altar with nothing but good intentions, positive actions and done everything else right.
Side Note: This typically happens to the few good AND faithful (make the distinction) men remaining out there, as they and repeatedly-scorned women seem to always collide in life when it comes to relationships.
The next thing you know, she’s more and more distant, cold in bed, making up lies about how she feels, etc. etc. etc. The difference is, she’s upgrading (or so she thinks, most of the time, because the action on her part is completely steeped in lust/greed and overall selfishness — she is deceived about the proverbial grass actually being Field Turf on the other side), whereas women don’t leave a guy just for d*ck and go through all those lengths to get out of a relationship. Whether she actuallyDOES end up with an upgrade (usually not, and when it collapses, she is indomitable when it comes to dating and relationships ever again, if you’re a man) or not is arbitrary and a case-by-case situation, but it is worth noting.
WHEN SOMEONE FEELS LIKE THEY ARE NOT GETTING WHAT THEY WANT AT HOME, THEY WILL SABOTAGE THE SITUATION, HOWEVER GOOD IT MAY BE FOR THEM, IN ORDER TO GET WHAT THEY WANT ELSEWHERE.
Case in point:
BUT WHEN IT DOESN’T WORK OUT LIKE YOU EXPECTED IT WOULD — EVEN AFTER IT SEEMED GOOD FOR A FEW MONTHS OR SO, YOU END UP WITH THE “EAT ASS” (Kevin Hart Joke) LOOK ON YOUR FACE LIKE THIS:
Final Side Note: IF IT DON’T APPLY TO YOU, LET IT FLY. People with guilty consciences are always the first ones to fly off the handle with the proverbial “Well, not ME!” or the “Not ALLLLLLL women do thaaaaaaaaaaaaatttttttt-uh!”
Keep it to yourself. For the majority of the rest of us, we know this to be true.