Obey Your Thirst


Obey Your Thirst

M.D. Wright

8.2.2011

Thirst. What is it? What does it consist of? Do you know it when you see it, like pornography? Most of us do, but some people, in their attempts to avoid scrutiny or just flat out reach like Mark Teixeira on a bad throw from Eduardo Nuñez, will accuse the slightest actions on the part of someone else as something “thirsty”. I feel it is my duty to clear the air a bit.

WHAT THIRST IS:

— Tongue wagging like Mike Jordan at every woman that passes you while you’re on the stoop with your boys, even making cat calls at universally-understood-to-be underage girls. And yes, I do see this a LOT.

— Throwing a pass at the same chick who goes out of her way to avoid so much as eye contact with you, despite the fact she’s turned you down at least a dozen times for dates.

— Chasing after a dude who has made it clear he just wanted to bag you up like a stock boy at the old A&P Supermarkets. You let him beat. That’s all he wanted. Move on. If he was trying to wife you, he would have by now. Stop playing yourself out of position.

— Blowing up my phone like Jack Tatum used to do to pitiful Wide Receivers. Men are intentional, even when they don’t realize that they are. Calling me every 15 minutes like you’re my hedge fund manager is not going to make me want you more. In fact, the converse is going to be true.

WHAT THIRST ISN’T:

— Merely showing interest in someone you like, knowing you may not get the chance to do so again (particularly in a passing setting, such as the bus, subway, on the street in midtown or by  happenstance at a social gathering.

— Smiling, seeking to start up conversation with a guy or a gyal who you spotted from afar at your friend’s wedding or at a restaurant or (gah) a club.

— Getting into his line of sight and giving him The Eye to let him know that you noticed him noticing you, or wanting him to notice you; not because you are starving for attention from men, but knowing that certain men don’t feel the need to chase women, and you want to move away from dudes who DO chase anything with two breasts (even if they’re two cup sizes bigger due to silicon) and an ass (same). Smart women know the difference between a man who is thirsty and one who is self-confident and self-assured enough not to need to chase women.

Girls don’t.

— Asking about her through your friends or trying to figure out how you can reach her without approaching her on a salacious tip.

And so on.

However, to let some people tell it — and these are usually the same people who claim to be the first to start trends, slang and have leaked LPs before they were ever even leaked — everything is “thirsty” nowadays.

You can’t speak to a woman or a guy without someone accusing you of being “thirsty”. You can’t smile without someone thinking you’re desperate to be with someone, so you must have to seduce them in order to get attention. You can’t even suggest that you and her go out on a date sometime, without being accused of being a “thirsty nugga”. A chick can’t be forward (???) without someone thinking she must be a slag or some desperada because God forbid she asked the guy out first — as if the fact doesn’t remain that a woman who has the stones to throw the fear of rejection to the wind and go for what she wants doesn’t get more respect than one who tries to play coy, play hard to get and choose instances such as these to willfully go back to “traditional” roles — when she is otherwise on some over-the-top feminist BS.

I could go on and on, but the point is, KNOCK IT OFF with the overuse of the word thirsty!

You wanna know what thirsty really is???

Regardless of what you think thirst is, according to your own definition. LIVE YOUR LIFE!

 

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