Pet Peeve Phrase Of The Day
***EDITOR’S NOTE: This may or may not become a staple of my blog for 2010, but for this week, I’m definitely going to come up with with a phrase (maybe more) per day that annoys me and write about it when I feel like it’s being overused.
“EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON”.
Seriously? You don’t Really Mean It. I believe it is a cop-out phrase and a way of giving people false hope in a desperate or foul situation — or a lazy way to offer a salve for someone who is going through. I hear it so often, especially when people hear what you’ve been through (and they have been shielded by their parents for the most part, and don’t really go through anything non-trivial).
I’d truly hate to see how people handle situations when the shoe is on the other foot and they have to deal when nothing else works.
You will NEVER hear me utter that phrase. And no one who knows me can honestly say they’ve ever heard me, because I don’t believe it to be true, nor have I ever.
I’ve had some foul things happen to me. I’ve DONE some foul things that have f’ed me over for years. But the decisions made for me (even after I had turned 18) and some of the maladies that I’ve had to deal with (Erythrodermic Psoriasis and Sepsis ruining my entire 4 years in high school, nearly killing me — breaking my back in 2007, and this unheard of drought of going on 5 years without being able to land a full-time job) I KNOW there cannot be a purpose therein.
What? Missing out on a legitimate chance to play cornerback or safety in the NFL? Or at LEAST playing basketball at the college level (I will admit, my game didn’t become complete until I was a senior in high school and only being 5’10” wasn’t going to get me many looks unless I walked on), but I could have made the NFL as a CB/S and that’s not a reach at all. People who know me know this is factual.
What? Going without a job (minus 3 two-bit, two-month stints at BS “jobs” that weren’t even paying me half of what I was making at my last full-time job, which I left in mid-2005 WITHOUT A DEGREE AT THAT TIME?) for all this time? To prove what? No one besides jump offs and Burning Broads will date you ha? I get tired of people saying “Everything Happens For A Reason” and then saying “oh, well you know you can minister to people all day instead”.
I was ministering to people on my job, at the gym, playing ball — and not preaching, but REAL ministry. Again, ask the cats who I worked with, worked out with at the gym or played ball with at Tillary, 99th, UNCG, A&T or Jamestown Six Forks, elsewhere, etc. and they’ll tell you that even while raining down Js, catching alleys (before I broke my back) and teaching cats how to do the Step-Back (I was one of the first cats at the aforementioned courts to use that move back in 2000 — give me credit ha; Kiki Vandeweghe popularised it in the NBA, but I did it at the local level).
But this jobless s— is beyond ridiculous. I’ve written about this many times, so I won’t go off on that tangent right now, but please tell me what possible REASON there is for going through this? I don’t need “patience”. The fact I haven’t offed myself nor anyone else and still have my sanity proves that.
I don’t lack for faith, because I believed God to provide for everything I needed the entire time and I never went without. Sure, I can’t travel like I used to, or shop, or even go out on dates, or hang with guys of my ilk like young DK and young Lee, but I don’t starve, I have a roof over my head and my clothes and shoes (miraculously, like the Israelites in the Bible when they were in the wilderness) still look like new. God is faithful and I’m faithful to Him.
Besides, I spend so much time looking for jobs, brainstorming about business opportunities and how to network more efficiently that I probably reached MORE (ministering) people before the advent of Facebook — and other social networking mediums — than I do now. Besides, I’ve come close to snapping completely these past few months, because if ANYTHING, I thought moving back to New York with my loose ends tied up would make finding a job a lot easier and would result in a hire by now. It will have been exactly 8 months… EIGHT MONTHS… since I graduated in May, this coming Friday. EIGHT MONTHS. Economy or not, as many people as I know and network with and still nothing?
***BY THE WAY: Shouts to those who have helped me reach out to people who could potentially help me (my cousin Tyhesia Brown, Maria Reliford, Daphnee Pierre, etc.)
But I hear people using this disgusting line in reference to anything that they’re too lazy to listen and hear the full story about, and analyze/assess what happened so that they can come a full realization surrounding what happened to bring things to that point. It is a cop-out and a lazy line.
I hear it in reference to the earthquake in Haiti. SERIOUSLY? ARE YOU DEAD ASS?
I hear it in reference almost anything unfortunate.
I rarely hear it from people who are actually IN those situations, but even when I do, I wonder WHY.