My Take On Interracial Relationships


My Take On Interracial Relationships
M.D. Wright
2.23.09

First of all, my opinion on this is rather simple, so this will be brief. I’m trying to get back into blog mode. I took a month off basically to handle ultra-important things. However, being back in school, you meet new people, hear new stories… I mean, stories ha and it gets you to thinking.

Of late, I have heard a LOT of White women (friends of mine, specifically) tell me that they love dating Black men. I ask them, “But why Black? Why stop there?” ha. The response I get is shocking, because I never heard this before in my life:

“Well, I just don’t find the great majority of White guys attractive. AT ALL.”

Wow.

I never heard it before and to this day I don’t know what to think when I hear that; particularly when I’ve had a couple of them flirt with me. It’s pretty hilarious.

I’ve heard other female friends who are White say it is merely a product of their upbringing — that they grew up mostly around Blacks and Hispanics.

OK.

I bring that up, because an interesting dynamic is being developed as a result of this rather recent paradigm shift. Oh, the White is Right philosophy is still in full effect (especially in the minds of the parents of young women who aren’t Black — in reference to their daughters dating or potentially marrying Black men), let’s not fool ourselves here. I’ve overheard several parental squabbles (usually the father beefin’, because the mother sometimes has a few skeletons in her closet if you know what I mean ha).

I have several dudes that I am cool with, a few of them friends of mine who have pulled women of EVERY ethnicity. I will not incriminate myself here by speaking about my foibles and journey while forming the Rainbow Coalition ha but I will say that being a Black man in the eyes of women under 45 isn’t the terrible thing it USED to be dear God. It’s not gone, nor will it ever be, but that stigma isn’t as strong.

Meanwhile, on the other front, I have noticed how this affects relationships between Black men and Black women. I’m the first to admit, I don’t give a rat’s culo who ANYONE dates nor what their motives are for doing so. If only more people used that mindset good heavens. Anyway, for the most part, I will say my female friends who are Black (about 2/3 of the total) are not your typical ones who get all up in arms even at the sight of a Black guy with a non-Black woman. Thank God. I wouldn’t stand for hearing that bullshit anyway. However, much credit to them, because it makes me respect them even more than I already do (they know who they are).

Nevertheless, there is one set of guys here who should be addressed: the guy who is extremely shy, or geeky/nerdy/dorky/homely (or ugly, if you want to be politically incorrect) guy who stands no chance with 90% of the Black female population. You want to know what caused me to write this blog? LOOKING AT BLAKE GRIFFIN’S PARENTS DEAR GOD. His dad probably wouldn’t have gotten a second look from 3/4 of the Black women he grew up with. Meanwhile, the woman he married is White (nothing special to write home about herself, but ok…) and they are happy together. Or so it seems. I just wonder, when a guy – even if he’s not shy or any of those other qualities (but nonetheless just as smart as those guys while maintaining social equilibrium) manages to get overlooked by the same women, how’s he supposed to react when he gets the Gas Face from those who ultimately ends up with the woman(en) who will accept him as is and won’t try to change him into “more cool” or make him something that he’s not so that she will feel comfortable bringing him around her girls and her family?

Feel free to offer input. This is one of my rare open-ended blog discussions ha. Blame this one on the Kansas/Oklahoma game Dear God.

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